Red squirrels

Few squirrels have earned such a reputation for playfulness and roguery as the Red squirrel. This squirrel is a well-known backyard and ravine inhabitant that often has a saucy regard for its human neighbors. A Red squirrel will firmly scold all intruders with shrill chatters, clucks and sputters, falsettos, tail flicking and feet stamping. Even when it is undisturbed, this chatterbox often chirps as it goes about its daily rountine Squirrels are a threat to society, more of a threat than aliens and dolphins combined (unless theyre the same thing, in which case they already are combined). The only people who are a greater threat to society than squirrels are (not necessarily in this order) terrorists, rogue states, the coalition of the willing, squirrel sympathisers (including those who fund squirrels and provide them with weapons).

Facts and speculation about squirrels.

Squirrel is not an anagram of explosion.

Squirrels commit fraud on a daily basis.