DESCRIPTION:
I hope the topicality of this song will excuse the rough edges of my performance!

Alastair Campbell accidentally coined a new word yesterday, 'woefuk', when tweeting a comment to describe RIM's (Research in Motion's) handling of the problems with the Blackberry service, which has been severely disrupted since Monday. It was merely a typographical error, but Mr Campbell said that if it passed into common currency, he hoped to be acknowledged as its author. It's my pleasure, Mr Campbell; the word is far too apposite to be allowed to disappear!

We all love blowing raspberries, we're happy girls and boys;
It's our delight both day and night to make a fruity noise.
Each "pfthfth!" is rich in meaning and we all have such a ball
Though most grown-ups are scornful and insist they mean pfthfth-all.

When I woke up this morning, I found to my dismay
That when I tried a greeting "Oooof!" was all that I could say.
Each attempt produced a "Oooofff!" - I felt an utter jerk
So I screamed and threw a tantrum, 'cause my raspberry wouldn't work.

At the crèche I later met my friends and all became quite clear;
No-one's raspberry worked and "Oooofff!" was all that you could hear.
Unable to communicate we all fell into gloom;
We cried and stamped our feet and chucked our toys around the room.

"Perhaps the system's blocked," said Al, a boy who's good with words,
Then he strained and went bright red but all he managed was a "Pooooop!"
"The whole thing's woefuk," he declared, "but I'm glad that thing's been freed."
"Too much information, Al," was what we all agreed!

Sulking in my playpen, with a very heavy heart
It seemed to me that raspberries maybe aren't so very smart.
A big kid with a Granny Smith yelled, "Ipad!" with a smirk;
"I bet you'd like this apple, now your raspberry doesn't work!"

words and music by Paddy Wex, October 13th 2011