DESCRIPTION:
The original version of "Plastic Jesus" was an actual radio advertisement in the1940s and 50s for a company that made plastic dashboard statuettes of Jesus and offered them for sale in various states including Texas and West Virginia. This parody is generally attributed to Atlanta songwriter Ernie Marrs, who wrote a number of topical songs that were recorded by Pete Seeger. Seeger had actually planned to record "Plastic Jesus," but changed his mind. He wrote that he liked the song a lot because it showed how people accept plastic or illusion over substance but he decided not to sing the song any more because he did not want to offend any Roman Catholics.

Ernie Marrs did record it in the 1960s for "Broadside" Magazine. A shorter version was printed in "Sing Out" (1964).

However this satirical song was around before Marrs adapted (and copyrighted) it. It was actually written by two West Coast musicians, Ed Rush and George Cromarty.

Here is how Ed Rush describes it: "As bored teenagers in Fresno, California in the late 50's my friends and I used to sit around on hot summer nights playing with a radio to find distant stations. A favorite was (as I dimly recall) a station with the call letters (maybe) XERB, from Del Rio, Texas. ... They peddled all sorts of tacky quasi-religious stuff, including plastic statues of Jesus, Mary, etc. These were guaranteed to protect the buyer, especially if he sent cash. One of our favorite programs often featured rousing spiritual anthems, including one song that started, 'I don't care if it rains or freezes, leaning on the arms of Jesus...' Being slightly irreverant teenagers, George and I came up with 'I don't care if it rains or freezes, long as I've got my plastic Jesus...', etc, etc. I clearly recall rolling on the floor with laughter for about an hour". He also notes: "In mid-1963 a Chicago disc jockey played Plastic Jesus several times a day and nearly got fired by his very Catholic boss."

When it was printed in "Sing Out" and "Broadside" angry subscribers asked how they could publish something so blasphemous. Gordon Friesen of "Sing Out" defended the song: "'Where does the sacrilege lie really, with the song, or those greedy for profits, who debase the Savior by producing and peddling these cheap little trinkets in his image?'"

This song was requested by beardedone85.

Lyrics and chords:
C
I don't care if it rains or freezes,
F
Long as I have my plastic Jesus
C .............................................. G7
Riding on the dashboard of my car,
C
Through my trials and tribulations
F
And my travels through the nation
G7........................................ C
With my plastic Jesus I'll go far

Plastic Jesus,
Plastic Jesus
Riding on the dashboard of my car
I'm afraid he'll have to go,
His magnets ruin my radio
And if I have a wreck, he'll leave a scar

Riding through the thoroughfare,
With his nose up in the air
A wreck may be ahead, but he don't mind
Trouble coming, he don't see,
He just keeps his eyes on me
And any other thing that lies behind

Plastic Jesus,
Plastic Jesus,
Riding on the dashboard of my car
Though the sun that shines on his back
Makes him peel, chip, and crack
A little patching keeps him up to par

When pedestrians try to cross
I let them know whose boss
I never blow my horn or give them warning
I ride all over town,
Trying to run them down
And it's seldom that they live to see the morning

Plastic Jesus,
Plastic Jesus
Riding on the dashboard of my car
His halo fits just right
And I use it as a sight
And they'll scatter or they'll splatter near and far

When I'm in a traffic jam
He don't care if I say Damn
I can let all sorts of curses roll
Plastic Jesus doesn't hear,
For he has a plastic ear
The man who invented plastic saved my soul

Plastic Jesus,
Plastic Jesus
Riding on the dashboard of my car
Once his robe was snowy white,
Now it isn't quite so bright
Stained by the smoke of my cigar

If I weave around at night
And the policemen think I'm tight
They'll never find my bottle, though they ask
Plastic Jesus shelters me,
For his head comes off, you see
He's hollow and I use him for a flask

Plastic Jesus,
Plastic Jesus
Riding on the dashboard of my car
Ride with me and have a dram
Of the blood of the Lamb
Plastic Jesus is a holy bar

I don't care if the night is scary
As long as I got the Virgin Mary
Sittin' on the dashboard of my car.
She don't slip and she don't slide
Cuz her ass is magnetized
Sittin' on the dashboard of my car.

Plastic Jesus,
Plastic Jesus
Riding on the dashboard of my car
I'm afraid he'll have to go,
His magnets ruin my radio
And if I have a wreck, he'll leave a scar

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