DESCRIPTION:
"Margaret" (Trudeau) parody/novelty song (to the melody of Kenny Roger's "Lucille") by Canadian broadcaster, actor, lyricist, and bestselling childrens author Frank Proctor. Released in 1977, "Margaret" received major national attention at radio and press.
"Margaret" lyrics:
In a bar at the capital across from the Rideau
On a bar stool she took off her rings
I thought I'd get closer so I walked on over
I sat down and asked her her name
When the drinks finally hit her she said I'm no quitter
But I've finally quit living on dreams
I'm hungry for laughter and here ever after
I'm after whatever photography brings

In the mirror I saw him and I closely watched him
Rose petals a droopy disgrace
He came to the woman and sat down beside her
He had a strange look on his face
He was carrying Pampers some Arrowroot cookies
Dishpan hands were swollwn and red
But he started shakin' and she started a-quakin'
He turned to the woman and said

Chorus
You picked a fine time to leave me, Margaret
Three hungry children and I'm losing Quebec
Sure I've got Horner, but I can't hug Horner
And whaddya mean "Wanna bet?"
You picked a fine time to leave me, Margaret

After he left us I ordered more Pepsi
I thought how she made him look small
From the lights of the Rideau he climbed in his limo
And sat without talkin' at all
She was a beauty a real camera cutie
She wanted to snap one of me
An 8 X 10 glossy but oh she's too bossy
'Sides she's framed poor Pierre can't ya see

You picked a fine time to leave me, Margaret
Three hungry children and I'm losing Quebec
Sure I've got Horner, but I can't hug Horner
And whaddya mean "Wanna bet?"
You picked a fine time to leave me, Margaret

Repeat chorus
Spoken in the extro:
Ah, oh Maggie, ya take group rates? Uh, photos, ya know, for albums? I'd like to get some for the kids and family myself. I'd vote for you, you, huh, of sure, sign me up Margaret

*Note:
Jack Horner, who had lost the leadership race for the Progressive Conservatives in 1976, crossed the floor in April 1977 to join the Liberal cabinet