The Neverland Rancheros

Love Letters & Death Threats (2007)



Buy this AMAZING 13-track album at our online store for a nominal $10.99!!! (Also available through AMAZON.COM)Available locally at Good Times Music and Mediaslave in Houghton, MI. Yes, this officially means that the only two retail outlets which carry our disc are directly across the street from each other!



TNR Merch



Go dress your skank ass up in some AWESOME TNR MERCHANDISE! Sexy t-shirts, hoodies, buttons and stickers for AWESOME KIDS ONLY!!! (We now have thongs, maternity shirts and dog clothing!!! Why?! Because WE'RE AWESOME!!!)



TNR on iTunes!

Yep, we're available on iTunes too. hit that shit up for an economical $0.99 per track!



Biography



Explosions. Robots. Lasers. A knife fight to the death versus Dracula. What do these things have in common? They're all far less thrilling than the rock n' roll stylings of Upper Michigan's hottest three-piece, THE NEVERLAND RANCHEROS.



With their SURFABILLY HARDMETAL PARTYCORE ROCK N' ROLL, THE NEVERLAND RANCHEROS are pumping danger and mystery back into rock music one aggressive-yet-catchy note at a time. Riding the success of local FM radio hits like "Ethel" and "The Coke Yacht," 5-star Amazon.com reviews for their 2007 debut LOVE LETTERS & DEATH THREATS, and an upcoming feature on Versailles Records’ “Anthem Rock” compilation (2009), THE NEVERLAND RANCHEROS are punching lameness square in its face and scoring an uncontestable victory for rock n' rollers everywhere. You think it's cool, and so does your mom--whether she admits it or not.



It’s long been the mantra of bitter nerds that bar bands are the lowest link in the rock n’ roll food chain. But to truly understand and appreciate THE NEVERLAND RANCHEROS, your best bet may be to spend an evening with them at an unassuming Upper Michigan tavern. It’s there that you’ll not only hear the trio performing their original masterworks, but also witness them taking songs that span decades and genres and bending them to the will of their high-octane power-pop agenda. More often than not, this feat is performed with an unapologetic, primitive urgency. Improvisation and spontaneity play key roles. It’s almost like an accessible form of punk rock, but without the boundaries and stigmas inherent to that p-word.



This isn’t to take anything away from the boys’ original tunes, or to say that THE NEVERLAND RANCHEROS only thrive in a bar setting. They’ve proven this time and time again by successfully rocking the living hell out of all-ages shows, house parties, outdoor festivals, an AWA professional wrestling event, and even the occasional wedding. Analysts predict that THE NEVERLAND RANCHEROS will play on the moon by the year 2016.



THE NEVERLAND RANCHEROS prove a point: the rock n' roll landscape need not be polarized between "fun" bands and "dangerous" bands. Rather, they preach the undeniable rock n' roll truth that fun and danger are one in the same. THE NEVERLAND RANCHEROS are the sonic equivalent of Indiana Jones and The Fonz racing speedboats down a shark-filled river of molten lava.



THE NEVERLAND RANCHEROS are tougher than RATT, sing-alongier than the Beach Boys, more seductive than Tom Jones, and prettier than Elvis. They catch massive sonic waves like Dick Dale. They infuse their jams with a raw masculine sexuality that makes Buckcherry sound like an asexual Dashboard Confessional cover band. THE NEVERLAND RANCHEROS take no prisoners. THE NEVERLAND RANCHEROS aren't afraid of the dark. THE NEVERLAND RANCHEROS won't RSVP for your birthday party, but then they'll show up anyway and drink all the soda and not even bring you a present.



Leo



Mark



Kurt



More Free Music!

Need MORE hot TNR jams? Preview our entire album for free at LAST.FM.



Radio



Make sure to request your favorite LL&DT track on the following high-quality radio stations:

The Rockin' Eagle 98.7FM serving Michigan's Western/Central Upper Peninsula. Visit their request page or nag super-DJ Mark Price (e-mail: theshock[at]up.net) to rip some sweet TNR jams on his show. Better yet, drunk dial their toll-free number: 1-877-985-ROCK.

WMTU 91.9FM in Houghton. (906) 487-1600 or wmturequest on AIM.



Royalty-Free Rights



Attention filmmakers, advertising professionals, and production houses! Need some REAL ROCK N' ROLL for your next meaningless project? Purchase unlimited royalty-free rights to LOVE LETTERS & DEATH THREATS through ProductionTrax.com!



We edited our profile with your dad!