PURE VOLUME ACCOUNT
Thurman Jane and sister Miriam Jane were poor children living on the street, where they had no choice but to pursue a life of music and sexual deviance. Unwanted in their prissy hometown in Orange County, California, they decided to move to a far away land that called to them in their dreams.The Sexual Frontier.
They flew there on a magic keytar in the middle of the night, and were greeted by people who only knew love. They met Papa Dill, the cowbell master, who told them to start a band. Thurman and Miriam feasted on butter balls and whiskey all night long and made love until morning. At sunrise, it dawned on them that Papa Dill was right: they needed to return to Earth with the most perfect band in all the world, one with which to bring home their messages of fun, unbridled sexual liberation. And so they began their journey, traversing the Venusian landscapes that compose the Sexual Frontier, in search of the perfect compatriates with which to create such music.
One night, walking the beach on the shores of the Orion Sea, they heard the pounding rhythms of drums, punctuated by the sounds of a rusty trombone. Following the sounds, they encountered a solitary hut on the beach, where resided the Fluffer of all Fluffs, Rex Fluffington, playing Moby Dick with his right hand whilst drinking a martini in his left. They listened to him play throughout the night, banging the drums like a mad monkey man, but with the finesse of a 12-year-old Russian gymnast. They asked him to join their adventure. And so he agreed. And it was good.
The trio continued onward together, making their way through the Wizarding Woods, on their way to Eros Idyll. At one point they sat in a glade known as Glitter Glen to eat a little picnic. They ate and rested, and as they lay spooning on the glitter-dappled grass, they were encountered by a foxy little red head astride a gallant unicorn. Her name was (appropriately enough) The Red Fox, who turned out not only to be a bad-ass bass player, but to have the hottest ass any of them had ever seen. They asked her to join their troup of travelling troubadors, and she agreed. And it was good.
Just outside the walls of Eros Idyll, the idyllic capitol of the Sexual Frontier, they encountered none other than the DB, a fluffer who gave the greatest blow-job any of them had ever received. She could play no music but worked the flesh flute so well that they asked her to join their adventure as well. So she agreed. And damn, is she good.
'Twas their last night in The Sexual Frontier. This night, they wandered the great capitol of Eros Idyll, marveling at the balance between science and nature, ethos and eros, desire and sacrifice, order and anarchy. From decadent dens to highest temples they wandered until they found themselves at the Great Temple of Eros, where they met the High Priest, Eros the Elf Punk. No he was not the object of worship. All the priests take on the name Eros in order to represent their union with the spirit of Eros. Eros the Elf Punk blessed the travelers and instructed them that upon their return to earth, they must seek out his earthly projection, the Reverend Blumpkin Bobbins, who - as band manager and pimp - will devote himself to elevating their exposure to the peoples of earth, to spreading their message as an antidote to sexual repression, artistic suppression, and bad taste in music.
Now they're back from a land both far and near, to bring you the messages they hold so dear. They are the Messengers from the Sexual Frontier!!
