Black Fag

Location:
Mimosa Beach, California, US
Type:
Artist / Band / Musician
Genre:
Punk / Hardcore / Christian Rap
Label:
Rockum Records
Type:
Indie
The story of Black Fag begins in the small town of New Hope, PA. Singer Liberace Morris was raised in neighboring Doylestown, but found a home among New Hope's thriving gay community. He worked at a vintage clothing/toy store while pursuing musical theatre at the Bucks County Playhouse at night. One night after Pippin rehearsal, Liberace came home to find his boyfriend in bed with another man. While drowning his sorrows at the local watering hole, The Raven, Liberace started singing and playing Black Flag's "Nervous Breakdown" on the piano. The rest of the bar simply ate it up until the end of the song, when Liberace stood up and started haphazardly hurling martini glasses around the place. He was permanently ejected from The Raven and convinced that his life was officially over.

While lying on the sidewalk debating what type of pills would make for the most dramatic accessory to his final exit, a shadow loomed over him. It was bassist Cher Dykeowski, a biker dyke like no other, who was in town for the annual motorcycle rally. She, too, was a Black Flag fan, and had seen something special in Liberace's performance. Having not had a steady home since her parents kicked her out after she attended her senior prom with her Phys. Ed. teacher, Cher was a wanderer with plans to make her way to California. She offered Liberace the bitch seat on her Harley and, with nothing left for either of them in Pennsylvania, they set off on an epic cross-country journey, which included Cher winning a blue ribbon at the Annual Gay Rodeo in Scottsdale, AZ along the way. (And believe you me, the rest of that trip makes "Priscilla, Queen of the Desert" look like Andy Warhol's "Sleep", but thats a tale to be told on another day.)In the meantime, Greg Streisand had been dishonorably discharged from the U.S. Navy for violating their "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy. He told by deliberately misinterpreting the term "military dress" and showing up to his superior officer's court martial hearing in a stunning Arnold Scaasi gown. He was left struggling to make ends meet while working at a flower shop in West Hollywood, CA. One day, a bronzed young stud, Robo Simmons, came into the shop and there were instant sparks between the two. It turned out that Robo was the entertainment director on a Royal Caribbean cruise ship docked in Long Beach over the weekend, so Greg and Robo instantly bonded over their love of the sea and entered into a whirlwind romance. Greg's more open-minded Navy buddies had turned him onto Black Flag, and anything that turned Greg on turned Robo on, too. Robo's job took him away from Greg for weeks at a time, but when the two were together (and not in bed) they would make creme brulee in the nude and sing songs like "Gimme Gimme Gimme" and "Wasted" to each other.Liberace and Cher finally made it to California and ended up crashing in West Hollywood with some friends of Cher's who ran a whole foods collective. Liberace began to pursue his dream of becoming a singer by dabbling in the local cabaret circuit. In between show tunes and old standards, he would slip a Black Flag cover into his set, always dedicating it to Cher, who faithfully attended all of his shows. The Flag songs were never popular with the crowds, but one night Greg and Robo caught the show and complimented him on it afterwards. Flattered, Liberace bought them drinks and introduced them to Cher. After last call, they all stumbled back to Greg and Robo's apartment and jokingly started playing Black Flag covers on the pawn shop instruments Greg and Robo had been collecting. One by one, they all passed out for the night, but the next morning, over Greg's famous homemade crepes, they decided they would start a band dedicated to their mutually favorite music.Despite concerns that the band's name was a little too on-the-nose, Black Fag was born. Keep an eye out for their next show: it's to-die-for!
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