New iPhone Commercial Has Kids Singing a Pixies Song About a Giant Black Phallus

Published: April 22, 2014

In times like these, it almost feels like consumerism is out to destroy art.Pixies, arguably among the the most iconic independent rock bands of America, oncewrote a song calledGigantic, pretty early into their career. Bassit Kim Deal, who wrote and sang it, said the track was inspired by the filmCrimes of the Heart, in which a woman falls in love with a young black man.The lyrics feature the line, “What a big black mass /What a hunk of love“, and the words “Gigantic, a big, big love” are repeated throughout the chorus. Youknow what it’s about.

And here is the same song, sung by a teenage (probably underage) girl in an Apple commercial for the iPhone, supposedly showing how powerful you become when you acquire the device. Never mind the fact that Gigantic wasoriginally about a chick who fell in love with a huge black cock:

Apple’s page for the commercial also states: “You have the power to create, shape, and share your life. It’s right there in your hand.” Shit, how did they know?

Now, if only they’d waited to use this song in advertisements for the new, reportedly larger iPhone 6- which will come in black, of course. We’d get behind that.

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