ICARUS JONES & DBEAT.URB MAGAZINE NEXT1000 ARTISTS!!!
!!!WAKE UP!!!.the video.ICARUS JONES & DBEAT from the album "smoke signals to satellites"
Icarus Jones & Dbeat present.
"SMOKE SIGNALS TO SATELLITES"
click the cd cover for more info:
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icarus jones was born in a small cult-like ceremony on a beach in oregon.his mother was a humble poppy seed farmer & his father was a professional hypnotist who had quit his job to surf.at the age of two icarus was recruited by a band of ninjas for his lawnmowing skills (actually "recruited" isn't the word.icarus' father also had a gambling problem & he lost his son to the ninjas betting on a bad game of chinese checkers).icarus was subsequently raised by the ninjas to respect all living things except punkass haters and bootleggers who will burn in hell.he was also trained religiously in the art of 'fu-schnicken' (mostly just a lot of speed reading, listening to hiphop, and ripping telephone books in half). unfortunately, this particular clan of ninjas was never taught the art of paying taxes, so in a mid-nineties IRS auction jones was sold to an independently wealthy escape artist/time traveller who needed a subject for his experiments in bionic engineering & rhythmic literature.to be continued.ok, continued:.my name is icarus jones.i am the voice of the almighty ICARUS JONES COLLECTIVE (which was, strangely enough, not named after me.go figure).we make music.sometimes money, but mostly music.and i make messes.mostly of myself.i like life.i'm 11'14".i have hair and eyes.i'm legally nocturnal.but not legally baptized.i breathe smoke & spit words.i think i played the bagpipes in a former life maybe.maybe not.but maybe.i'm quite partial to unpredictable weather, amish acid jazz, monkeys named murray.in fact, monkeys named anything, noodles, curb feelers, plastic explosives, stuffed aborigines, civil war reenactments, midget/pygmy/or even remotely small carnival employees, chihuahuas w/brown rice, blimps, blue cheese & black licorice, my numchuks, your numchuks.do you even have numchuks?.what're you thinking?.you gotta have numchuks, dude.and one of those laser pointer thingys.cuz then if the numchuks don't work you can tell people it's your 'zapper' and if they don't quit P'ing you the H off, your gonna 'zap' em in the F'ing A.unless they know right away that it's just a stupid laser pointy thinger.then either fake an agoraphobic seizure or try the numchuks again.if there's one thing my mama taught me in this life, it's how to quilt a mean friggin scarf, bro.seriously.think about that.you can teach a cold-necked person how to hitchhike up the river, but you can't just teach him how to keep his neck warm forever.but a scarf can.sometime in the near future you're probably going to have to answer a multiple choice question.if this does in fact happen to you, the answer will be 'B'.in the event that the answers are numbered instead of lettered, you're totally screwed.and if by some curious chance you still happen to be reading this.stop it. or at least understand that you're in way over your head at this point and you should probably get out while you can.
.seriously.
Icarus Jones has H E L L A T I G H T friends.
.swass.
