kasmohuxtable

Location:
New York City, New York, US
Type:
Artist / Band / Musician
Genre:
Comedy / Hip Hop
Site(s):
Label:
DEF PEN Music Group
Type:
Major
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So I met this girl at a little lounge in SoHo She was badder than and Bonequeesha’s & Bebe’s Kids combined! She had all the fellas in the club doing the I’m on the toilet shitting slash DAMN! face (Thats a Good Thing Ladies) .She was brown skin with a adorable face, pretty hair wit dimples about 5’3 . 150 pounds . Phat Ass with 24 Double A’s . But who needs Boobs . When you got a booty that’ll make Steve Wonder look back. But anyway we started talking on the phone daily . You know that Super jonesing the kind that makes the cell phone and house phone battery die . So anyway her phone convo was cool . I caught myself a few times thinking to myself "Can you please shut the fuck up" but not a lot She used send me pics of her poosie daily. different ones She was creative like for example . She had a pic of her poosie covered in Grape Kool AID mix . I used just be like wow In 2 weeks time I had 34 maybe 35 pics of her poosie and so did my homeboys (Just Kiddin) .But she was indeed fucking up my Sidekick Tmail memory We started chilling a lot going out around the city Like a month go by. I still didn’t G.T.D (Get The Draws) and my "Nigga" senses starting to kick in crazy A little voice starting telling me "FUCK this bitch She never gonna give you the punanny . She just using you for fast food and laughs Kas" But I fought off the voice cause I really believed shorty had potential . Another week went by and guess what ? She invited me over!!! So being the nigga I am . I started doing push ups and shit drinking mad Vitamins Waters . stretching I even put on my tight ass American Apparel undies Sprayed my socks wit Cologne and I went out and got me a fresh box of condoms size DKXL (DONKEY KONG XTRA LARGE) all that good stuff . But anyway I get to her place . She got Sade "Cherish The Day" playing slowly . She cooked MAC & Cheese, Corn on The Cobb, and Fried Chicken The chicken could’ve used a little more Adobo and Lawry’s but overall it was a good meal So she says "Kasmo you wanna go in my bedroom and watch a movie?" What you think I said in reply ? So after I said YES! . We walked in her room . I instantly seen some big shits flying around . So my ass took off running the other way thinking they was water bugs ( I grew up in the Hood) . So after she came and got me from under the kitchen table . She said "Kasmo you so silly those were butterflies babe" Then she told me . It was her fantasy to make love in room full of Butterflies In my head I’m like "Oh no not another Looney Tunes chick please God no!" . So now I’m laying on her bed watching this movie called "The NOTEBOOK" with about 6 big ass butterflies flying around (PICTURE IT IN YOUR HEAD ITS FUNNY I KNOW) . After like 10 mins . I say to myself "I guess she waiting on Kasmo" . So I hit her with the infamous thigh rub test . It worked!! in no time we was smooching and then we started Strokey Doking all willy nilly I think I even heard one of the male Butterflies say "You Lucky Bastard!! I hate you Kasmo!" I’m too not sure tho . Anyways the poosie was great it felt like a Jar of hot melted Vaseline It was nice & tight not too roomey some chicks poosie feel like you in a mansion wit no furniture . But hers was tight like the 2nd Bedroom in a Projects apartment But anyway after 2 rounds I was done . My legs felt like warm Spaghetti I had a headache . So I fell asleep 3 Hours later I woke up I was handcuffed butt naked to the bed She wasn’t in the room So I yelled "Portia!!!! What the fuck is going on!" . My dick getting all scared and shit he jumped inside my balls sack . So now I’m all alone my best friend left me (My DICK) . She finally stormed in the room all mad and shit and said . "Nigga you not gon just fuck me and quit me . If thats what you thought you got another thing coming PAH PAH!!" . I’m like "What the hell you talking about woman ? . Take these cuffs off and stop playing girl!! " . She didn’t say a word back . She just slapped the living shit outta me POW!! .My face was on fire and my vision was blurry. Then she said "Shut the fuck up!! and I mean shut the fuck up now!!" . We was in New York but right then and there I was in a STATE of shock Then all of a sudden I heard the tea kettle whistling like a MUTHAFUCKA! I’m thinking to myself "I know this bitch not gonna pour that hot ass water on me" . Then like a fucking psychic she said "I know what you thinking Kasmo Mr.Def Pen and yes I’m about to scorch your punk ass and then I’m going to shoot you" I started wiggling my ass off wishing I was The Incredible Hulk so I can break free .I started getting scared and my tear factory started flowing and I simply asked her "Why you doing this to me ? . I really like you Portia" The tea kettle still whistling like Muthafucka!!! Then she said remember Sydney that girl you fucked and ditched last year ? That was my little sister you bitch ass nigga . Now its payback time! . Sydney bring that hot ass tea kettle in here . Sydney walks in rocking a fucking freak-um dress that looks familiar because It’s the same dress she had on at that same fucking Lounge I met her sister in (SHAKING MY HEAD) . So in desperation I said "I swear to god . If you bitches hurt me . You will be dead by tomorrow at 4:30" . Before I can finish my dry ass threat . She poured that hot ass water on me . I started yelling my ass off screaming like a white girl in a 80’s horror movie . Then Portia handed her sister a gun and said "Now Finish this Lil cute muthafucka off girl" Sydney took the gun smiled. and pointed it at me . Then all of a sudden . I hear my boy DUCKETZ voice saying "WAKE UP NIGGA WE GOT SHOW TO DO. YOU SLEEPING IN THE STUDIO SLOBBING AND SHIT WAKE THAT ASS UP!!!" LMAOOOOO! -KasmO HUX www.defpenradio718.com
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