The Alter Boys

Want a copy?Purchase The Exotic Sounds of the Alter Boys @ Amazon.com.



Where do Alter Boys come from? Well honey, I'm glad you asked. You see, when a mommy and a daddy love each other, they show their affection in a loving union called sex. The daddy puts his penis in the mommy's vagina and his penis releases semen, which swim through the mommy's love canal in their search for mommy's egg. Once the semen reaches the egg they penetrate the hell out of it and get inside to make a baby. This is called conception. The conception of the Alter Boys isn't quite as exciting as this, and involves Blackie Lawless, which is just as gross. While on tour with Wasp, just after the new millennium, members of Dog Fashion Disco and Mushroomhead talked of a side project which would be a little breather from their full time bands. Well these little bastards got together, and like David Copperfield somehow banging Claudia Schiffer, began creating magic. The album was recorded in bits and pieces and the project rested because of scheduling and geographical roadblocks. Then along came a jackass with a car in his butt named Ryan Dunn that kicked us all in the ass to complete the record. We eventually let him become the 8th member, because we felt bad for him being so famous, rich and handsome. The boys put out The Exotic Sounds of the Alter Boys, and history wasn't affected in the least



Where can I get the cd?
A: You can get the CD @ Amazon.com, or at a local FYE store.
When are you guys planning on touring?
A: A tour isnt likely to happen. All the members have busy lives touring with other projects. Your best bet to hear Alter Boys material is to attend a Unified Culture show in the future.
Hey JMann whats up?
A: Whats kickin' sailor? jk Im not Jason Popson. So, yeah, no.
Id like to book the Alter Boys. Can you play my show?.
A: No. Alter Boys are like Pokemon, good luck getting them all in the same place at once. I can hook you up with a guy who can supply you with a paddle ball on a string though.
If I send you a random message will you respond?
A: No, sorry.
Who is this?
A: Turd Ferguson, its an over sized hat, its funny.
Hey guys how bout some new material?
A: There is no new material in existence at this time, and more than likely never will be. There are no initial plans at this time for a followup album, as this is considered a one time deal.
What the hell? Ryan Dunn is in the band?
A: Some consider him the honorary 8th member, others consider him an annoying house guest that overstayed his welcome. He sings about maybe 10 seconds of background vocals, but shows up alot during downtime between songs on the CD. Mainly bitching about how little he got to do on the cd.
On the cd who is the Naked Trucker? He sounds familiar.
A: That would be actor David Koechner of "Anchorman" fame (Champ Kind), and "The Comebacks". He was a featured player on SNL, and has appeared in various shows/ movies over the years.