Alan Partridge

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Im Alan Partridge, and im a fine example of the phrase "bounced back".

You see i used to have my own show on the telly "Knowing me,Knowing you".ahaaa etc.untill a gang of bitter bastards known as the "BBC" came along and snatched it away from me.Shortly after my wife left me for another man "boohoo",and my son fernando wont even answer the phone to me to this day.Its fair to say I was at a low point in my life,and i became heavily depressed because of it.

Turning to chocolate to ease my depression, mainly Toblerones ,but ocassionaly a Terrys chocolate orange.I was literaly eating 3 Toblerones a day at one point, and had put on about 4 stone in weight.There was a particular insidnent were i drove my Lexus (Lexi being the plural)to dundee in my bare feet.I dont know what i was thinking.



Nowadays theres nothing i prefer more than a gentle stroll through a forest with sonia,or quite often we like to visit old victorian follies.i feel it helps sonia ,not become completely English but hopefulyer hopefully.more often than not though, i find myself in the lazer bowl ,killing "shitty zombies" with children in care.

I was first attracted to the hard hitting sounds of dance music when my son fernando lent me a prodigy album.Although i wasnt much of a raver at the time, it reminded me some what of kraftwerk and peter gabriel, and being Norwichs biggest disc jockey, i had all the gear to pursue my interest in this scene.

Fortunately i have my class A girlfreind Sonja, (38) whom i love in a way.



sonja has been extremely supportive in my choice to further my breakbeat making skills, and often brings me my dinner on a tray, which i mark accordingly.

usual results:

eggs 10 on 10

bacon 10 on 10

beans 10 on 10

All in all .10 on 10

minor critisicms:

beans to close to the egg.I might want to mix them, but i want it to be my choice.Also sausage should be used as a breakwater for the beans.

Like so.